I feel like I need to preface this. This is a joke. It was a lab project from freecodecamp.org and I felt funny enough to publish this for the world to see.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

Peanuts and Grapes

Get ready for the world's most complicated peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

My great great great great great gradmother's best friend Jolene Thornsbury III made this amazing sandwich recipe while working as a wheat farmer in Pompei just before the volcanic disaster. This recipe was pried from the charred hands of her body during an excavation of the site and preserved in my family for generations to come. Now you too can experience the joys of tending a farm, grinding a whole backyards worth of wheat into a cup of flour and enjoying the taste of your own ego in this extremely complicated, plain tasting, peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Ingredients

Instructions

Growing/Harvesting your Ingredients

  1. Till the land using a hoe or an electric/gas tiller.
  2. Plant your wheat grape and peanut(?) seeds.
  3. Water them according to the directions you got from someone more experienced... Do I look like a gardener?
  4. Harvest your wheat, grapes and peanuts once they are ready for the season.

Bread

  1. Grind your wheat into flour.
  2. Boil your river water to separate any contaminates from the pure water.
  3. Let your water chill in a refridgerator or table until near room temperature.
  4. Mix your store bought yeast with some water.
  5. Add your yeast and water mixture to the flour, mix until a dough is formed. Let the dough rise to whatever you're supposed to let the dough rise to. Do I look like I've made bread before?
  6. Bake your bread.

Peanut Butter

  1. Grind your peanuts with some water until it looks like peanut butter.

Jelly

  1. Boil your grapes in the water. Dude I don't know how to make Jelly... Add some sugar or something.

Craft the Sandwich

  1. Cut your bread into two pieces.
  2. Put a generous amount of peanut butter on one side of one piece of bread.
  3. Put a generous amount of jelly on one side of the other piece of bread.
  4. Combine the two pieces of bread so that the jelly and the peanutbutter are touching.
  5. Cut it into FUCKING TRIANGLES IT'S MATHEMATICALLY MORE SANDWHICH!
  6. Enjoy!